Honestly, I think it's a bullshit excuse from bullshit people. I thought from adolescence until age 28 that I was too chubby to be attractive to anybody. Signed up for OKCupid, went on a couple of dates, and learned hell no was I ever wrong. Best thing I ever did for myself, by the way. Men are, of course,…

My own awkward story is very similar. Boyfriend and I are being very loud, thinking no one is home. He yells out something complimentary about the um, muscle tone in my vagina, which must have been the last straw for his poor father in the next room because immediately after that we hear a pointed "AHEM." We became…

IDK; when I'm on a date, my phone(s) are on silence; if I'm facing any opportunity of intimacy, the phone(s) off. Silent. In a different room.

Tangentially, I had an ex who tended to be just regular noisy. But every time he was about to come he got louder—and always the same noises. Eventually it was like conditioning, and I would get extra excited as soon as I started to hear it.

girl, all of us.

This happened to me! Boyfriend went downstairs and his dad asked him if he'd just murdered me based on the noises he'd been hearing. I couldn't make eye contact with his dad for quite awhile.

I hate to break it to guys but squirting is a trick. You can suck up a little bath water and do it any time so long as you're good at Kegels. Timing it with orgasm is just a trick, albeit a cool one.

*hugs* many of us have been there, no cringing!

So this didn't involve any actual sex, but I invited a guy I'd seen a couple times in for a nightcap. I poured us a couple of drinks and went to use the bathroom, expecting to come out and talk a bit, make out, see where things went. He apparently had a different idea because I came out of the bathroom to find him…

I was on a third date with a guy we'll call Joe. I hadn't had sex for a while and had offered on previous dates, but he wanted to wait, so I respected that. We go to the house that Joe is housesitting at for friends and start making out in the bedroom. I rip all of my clothes off in one smooth motion, tossing them to…

I feel like I need a sequel to this post.

After breaking up with my high school boyfriend and having a long, depressing freshman year of college, I met this guy named Clint at a summer beach party through friends. He was a perfect summer fling. He was an incredibly tall (6'7), sweet, laid back, brown curly haired stoner dude with a giant dick, and he lived…

File under Awkward: While having drunken sex in college, she started crying halfway through (but in no way stopping) and talking about her friend from high school who had committed suicide. Then she said "hurt me" and turned over so I could do her from behind.

Had an awful crush on this fellow actor in college. He was a Senior, I was a Soph. We played opposite each other in a play and did the flirty, "Hey, I like you" thing. He was very popular, so I ASSUMED he'd had girlfriends/sexy time before. We made out in his dorm room for a bit and things were progressing…when he…

I was dating this guy for a couple of weeks but hadn't slept with him yet because I was coming out of a bad relationship and wanted to take things slow. He said he was fine with that, but then still would ask if he could stay over every time we hung out. Then the Blackhawks won the Stanley Cup and I was in a good mood…

I've had "meh" but nothing that would stand a chance of winning the Pissing Contest. That said:

*Sigh*

I was 20 and he was 18. We were dating, but he wanted a girlfriend and I was in college and not ready to commit. We were making out and he unzipped my pants. I told him "ok, we can do this, but I'm still not going to be your girlfriend, we'll just be dating and having sex with each other." And he zipped my pants back…

K, so when I broke up with an ex, I wanted to go through a "slut phase" bc I was really inexperienced and I stupidly thought that if I could get more of this experience, I would then have a one night stand with my ex, and lure him back to me with my sexual prowess.