Friend to me after reading this article: “And apparently I have to like Third Eye Blind now. This day is not going well.”

Copy that and I will. It’s been tough the past couple of days to see all the coverage showing Bernie supporters as violent maniacs. People were not acting their best on Saturday, but it is not nearly as one-sided as what is being published. There were significant errors on both sides.

I’m sorry, I have to say something. I’m a Bernie supporter, and a longtime Jezebel reader, AND I was there in the room. I shot some videos that have been aired on major networks, and I actually have a relatively neutral perspective. Could you please interview me for an alternate view of what happened, instead of just…

Seems about right.

This lovely man came in every day, I burned his bread, and he left a $5.00 tip on a $4.00 meal. One time, he heard me (quietly, I swear) talking to another waitress about how I couldn’t afford to have my other cat spayed yet, and when he left, I found $100.00 under the cup for my cat.

This is only tangentially a food story, but it ends up in a Starbucks, so there you go.

Nice that these are for the most part positive stories of celebrities who haven’t let their fame turn them into entitled assholes. The Kevin Smith one in particular was awesome. (and poor Salman Rushdie! I both laughed and felt bad for laughing.)

Not directly related, but I always found interesting how Colonel Sanders (or “Uncle Kentucky” as he’s known in Japan) is viewed in Japan.

My favorite anecdote is how celebrating Hanshin Tigers Baseball fans threw a local Colonel Sanders prop into a river after winning the Japan Series title in 1985... prompting a…

Every dine and dasher I ever personally saw was a young white person. Every one. Just saying.

And my axe!

And my bow.

You have my sword.

I second this. Chick tracks and those fucking fake twenties.

Does anyone know how to become a contestant on Shark Tank?

I believe I can speak for all of us when I say, “Fuck Church Groups”

Who the hell just lets a fart fly in a restaurant like it’s nothing? I’ll run to the bathroom if I have to.

“Was that so hard?” = “The situation has been resolved to my satisfaction, but I’d still like to start a fight about it.”

So lots of tongue, got it.