I agree that this was one of the better Hatesongs, but I don't see why "clever" and "vitriolically, frothingly enraged" should be mutually exclusive. We deserve both.

She certainly walks funny after I've spent the night.

It's kind of easy to brute-force hack it though, you just need to design a robot capable of downing shots at at least 1000 times the average human speed.

Chuck: Play me in Geoffrey!
Geoffrey: I'm afraid I can't do that, Chuck.
Chuck: GODDAMMIT

"Trans*" doesn't even work on a geeky level, clearly it should be "^trans.*$ "

This is basically a really succinct expression of some bitching I was doing about the new "progressive" list of sexual orientations on Facebook… it's like a drop-down list of all these bizarre classifications that look like they should be in a biology textbook, when they could have just put a fucking blank text box…

Most of his passwords are generated by blacking out and having his head land on the space bar.

I think the accepted theory is that they offered Brian Jones in a sacrificial rite in exchange for one last hurrah with Sticky Fingers, and then Exile was just a drunken accident that somehow worked out. Not worth it, guys!

The AV Club

You could have sent me, you know, helpful feedback on the slash fic instead of embarrassing me in front of the entire AV Club. *cries into pillow*

I never forget a penis size.

People love it on here, but seemingly nowhere else. But yeah, that's the best and it could probably only be topped by an extraordinary Steve Brule feature film.

God's Not Dead 2: Ressurectric Judge-aloo

Fingers crossed for a Titté Brothers cameo!!!

C'mon, when's the Chris Carter from Throbbing Gristle gonna get his own show already?

You'd think by now Vice/Noisey would be pretty self-conscious about coming off as a bunch of smug, white hipster dipshits. Then you watch that video…

Dusk 2: Electric Dawnaloo

Boys and Girls always struck me as what middle-aged NPR listeners probably think frat-rock sounds like. Most fratbros I've ever encountered do not have this band on their radar, and they most certainly do not squirt tequila into each others' mouths to "Stuck Between Stations".

"Bush". "Swallowed". Heh. Heh.

Fun fact! There's actually a "12 Inches a Slave" porn parody already. Don't encourage them by googling it, though.