If he had only kept the bone from popping out at that Perkins restaurant...

No one has ever been more sued than Dan Olsen is about to be

Please stop typing for 48 hours.

As a longtime football fan with a passion for mystery, I did some examining and found out some things about the Dez Bryant situation.

Redacted? I played with with him.

I've followed/unfollowed him more times than I can count.

Whitehead and Gibbs came to near-blows in a team huddle during a second half timeout

I really hope the NFL fines him for that crap.

No man, the ICE needs to get plowed.

"I'll have a DUI on the rocks."

Everyone dies of starvation because John Madden raids the early bird dinner buffet everyday at precisely 245PM.

"We know that you've suffered through a lot of concussions...."

They never let me in!

HENDRIX: Are you experienced? Have you ever been experienced?

Not surprised someone incarcerated lacks a basic understanding of the rules.

"What a mess."

"We shall come over."

Cocaine speeds things up, you can even do the rehab quicker.

I am scared and horny because of this.....

In true Arnold Palmer fashion, it was actually half poop and half pee.