No joke here, but it would be incredible if this entire thing fell apart over a response in an AMA.

Some of us remember the good ol’ days, when the worst thing you could say about Toronto’s mayor was that he smoked a bunch of crack.

Then he dumped a giant bucket of mayonnaise.

Rob Ford’s Darryl Strawberry impression was much more spot-on.

His junior year of high school was 2010?

+1 one week chip

Oh wow, the risers and the outfits. Man, that’s giving me flashbacks to college and high scho*GETS STUFFED INTO LOCKER*

It’s not hard to look like a choirboy when you’re in the same city as Patrick Kane.

Wow, his pitch was per—

After Schwarber’s graduation, Middletown School District passed a bill that allowed for the immediate expansion of the high school’s lockers.

I prefer to get my cooking advice from your staff tech writer, Albert Burneko.

Totally true. He’s really at his best finding FA gems among the vets (or guys who fit a role in his system, and he is great at game planning, but his overall draft record really isn’t that good.

The truth is that Belichick doesn't know how to draft wide receivers. Look at their most successful WRs - Edelman was a QB, and Welker and Moss came via trade.

Murph has been my favorite Met for awhile now. While he is prone to bonehead moments, I think it has more to do with the team not being very good for a long time and because of that, he would lose focus in the field. He has been locked in since they acquired Cespedes, and has been great at bat and in the field. I know…

Murphy’s accomplishments aside, can we please take a moment to embrace the batshit craziness of the following statement:

Could you imagine if he would have tilted his hat?

Man, a lot of fires there lately...

Michigan fans: [Deface Magic Johnson Statue]

“That looks nothing like Magic Johnson.”

Hey, I didn’t get a harrumpf out of that guy