This is my favorite so far. RAINBOW CONNECTION had me hysterically laughing.

High fives to all your friends.

Ugh. I have the PERFECT story, but it is much too specific to share and still raw for the other party and friends (even though it literally happened years ago). I'll summarize it thus: I was dumped over a particularly horrible hallucination that just wouldn't quit—even after the effects of the drugs did. I'm going to…

Ugh. I have the PERFECT story, but it is much too specific to share and still raw for the other party and friends (even though it literally happened years ago). I'll summarize it thus: I was dumped over a particularly disturbing hallucination that just wouldn't quit—even after the effects of the drugs did. I'm going…

Nay... BALLER.

This sounds extremely dangerous. DANGEROUSLY DELICIOUS.

She can't win... and neither can other celebrities who use their platforms for the benefit of society. If they remain silent, they are "complacent". If they speak up, they are "taking up space." Few of us here at Jezebel need Emma Watson to tell us the talking points of feminism. But many people in the world obviously…

She's looking like the HBIC she's acting like.... relax.

Yes. And I don't know.

Thank you for this headline. Nailed it.

Looked at the Gawker comments. Immediately regretted it. EVERYONE IS THE WORST OVER THERE RIGHT NOW.

I must have missed the part where she labeled them racist...? I think she just pointed out how this type of objectification is historically shitty for WOC.

I made an audible noise after reading "I'm not aware who Jill Scott is..." I'm very sorry for you. Jill Scott is kind of a boss.

"Suddenly Republicans Are All About Getting Your Vote"

I understood 0% of those references. Sorry!

Blacked out on St. Paddy's Day senior year. Drunkenly stumbled into my sorority house the next AM and gave an epic "do as I say not as I do (but fuck it, do whatever you want when you're a senior)" speech to the freshmen (and others) who were there for breakfast. Stumbled into my 8:30AM class—reeking of booze—and got…

Uggghhh. Exactly. At the point in which seeing his ID eradicates your (racist/insane/unfounded) suspicion of clandestine activities, then insisting on seeing hers is just you flexing your muscles and being a dick. And like now is REALLY not the time to for you to be a dick—especially to a woman of color.

Don't you bring Natty Boh into this! That beverage is a national treasure.

I think your Barney-Dennis analogy is SO ON POINT. I would even say that this is true for serial killers with male victims too—men exercising power and control to the extreme and society deems it as "sick". We would never dare attempt to empathize with these psychos, while men who commit more "minor" acts of violence…

Nope. He will live out his days in his McMansion in the 'burbs as a midlevel manager for a large corporation or at a consulting firm. His only ambition is to prove that upward mobility exists, which he believes he will accomplish by rising out of the "lower middle-class" to the "upper middle class."