I would define A Self Important Cunt Who Can’t Swallow Their Pride as: someone who follows an other into a parking lot to get their point across

You, sir, are a butthead.

Unpopular opinion: I HATE THE PROPERTY BROTHERS.

“2 Cars in accident, perform exactly as expected!” doesn’t have the same mouse-magnetism now, does it?

Came here to say this. Crumple zones and a hot engine in front means the car doing the rear-ending is usually the one that looks worse off, but in reality it was supposed to do that.

The comments section is where Gawker writers learn about their topics

I’m no accident expert, but aren’t cars designed nowadays to crumple in the front as that FIAT did? If the car isn’t crumpling, then the drivers and passengers are absorbing the energy from the impact. Looks like the front of the FIAT just slid under the Volvo, hence why the Volvo’s bumper is fine. The seating…

Panda would’ve swung at it. Vlad would’ve hit it.

No to taxes and no to increased teacher salaries. Sounds like you really want to invest in your child’s future!

The real story behind almost every “worker shortage” is shitty pay.

That might generate $100 a year per teacher. Sounds like they need to raise taxes and significantly raise teacher salaries instead.

Can’t wait for SBNation’s longform profile of him.

Yeah, let’s look at that...

you don’t really need all that shit to run though.

Well actually, most available evidence shows that runners tend to have a lower incidence of knee arthritis than the general population. This might not be because of running per se but because runners tend to have lower body masses, though even when controlling for this runners tend to be healthier. I’m not as well…

No, this is really good advice. If a salesperson works with you, analyzes your stride, provides you with a half-dozen options, goes back to check if it’s in a slightly bigger size or a different color and finds a shoe you like, going on to Amazon to save $15 is a dick move. Don’t be a dick.

Welcome to Columbia, MD. Home of the chain restaurant.

On the other hand

Cue all the imbeciles who won’t get the joke in the headline. I’ve already fallen for this shit. Put another W in the win column for the Warriors. Winning 112-95 against the Lakers still counts as a win Deadspin!

It takes a microsecond to look it up yourself. Come on, you’re an adult — you’re an adult on the internet so surely you can think of some way to find it out yourself. Anyone ignorant must’ve been living under a rock in a information bereft mid-ocean island for 43 years (origin from ‘73 with even Uncle Reagan giving…