I'm still waiting for one of his non-denial denials where he actually utters the words, "No, I didn't do it" rather than some variation on "Bitches be crazy!" His responses have done more to convince me of his guilt than anything Mia Farrow has ever said.

For their part, PETA is saying that they intended the pamphlet, entitled "A Cow's Life" to be filled with cartoon images instead, but that volunteers mixed them up.

There was an article on Buzzfeed about it this morning: http://www.buzzfeed.com/chrisgeidner/t…

It's always possible that his denial will be so inept that he'll make things worse for himself.

Women like Janet Mock are killed by people who believe the ignorance Piers Morgan refuses to acknowledge in himself. But yeah, controversy machine, sure.

I LOVE FANNYPACK SO MUCH!!! Their group reminds me of TLC meets Salt-N-Pepa meets Devo. Maybe not Devo so much, but their outfits are solid.

In defense of my comparison I was traumatized by the slugs that lurked in my guinea pigs hutch and Piers Morgan leaves me with a similar feeling.

It's great! All the joy of more athletic positions, but with super comfy pillows to support you.

HEY. Be nice to slugs. They don't deserve that comparison.

That's an insult to slugs; they would probably be much better at hosting a talk show than this guy.

Nah, but a person who talks about being sexually abused as a child should publicly be called a liar by the rich, powerful man who she has accused. The rich, powerful man who married the teenaged girl that he watched grow up, as the boyfriend of that girl's adoptive mother. The rich, powerful man who is being…

Is anyone surprised that he's a disgusting slug person?

Swap House of Cards for Doctor Who and end the night with couch sex; you have my dream date. Unfortunately, we both have roommates, so this will not happen.

That is legit. Easily the best plan.

I see kids in court all the time, so I don't know where you're getting this "you can't bring your kids to court" thing. I mean, what else are you going to do if you can't get a sitter and you need to show up? Especially because this was apparently a family court/child support hearing, kids are very frequently at those.

Sigh. To paraphrase my favorite book, "A slavish concern for the strict definition of words is the sign of a bankrupt intellect."

Right? Now I want to do that instead of going out for a nice dinner.

I'm planning on getting take-out, a jug o' wine, and watching the Human Centipede trilogy...#blessed!

In my story above, I was 11 and white, and the girl who cut my hair was 9 and black.