The only thing I can think of:

But they still do Wilmer Valderrama, right? I get partial credit. 

OH I want to just brush it the other way at least, lol.

don’t give them any more ideas of product promotions 

So what happened? Did your brother live to tell the tale?

I would definitely watch on Netflix while stoned.

Oooo I was a truly horrid little guttersnipe. The time when I was 5 and I sneaked outside just before a big ladies luncheon only to sit at the table later picking ticks out of my hair and putting them on my salad plate. The time I was 7 and they drove up to the house with my Dad’s boss to see me peeing in the front…

Holy shit that is definitely not something bad you ‘did to’ your parents and I want to give you 7 million hugs.

I realize you already know this but it wasn't your fault. You were a child, telling was the right thing to do. The system let you all down. I hope you've forgiven yourself.

My mother and I had a very difficult relationship. She was emotionally and verbally abusive, I was a rebellious kid. When I was around 13 she had a hysterectomy and wasn’t allowed to climb stairs for six weeks. So I invited my friends over every day to smoke weed and drink in our basement. And she could only stand at…

Replace stolen guns with computers/consoles, and add in destroying a toddler’s room, two dented car doors, and dozens of dick drawings all on the house and driveway and you have my brother’s 20 person turned 100+ high school rager...

And in a movie-esq ending- he was woken up the next morning- among piles of passed…

I grew up in a two family house. A young couple lived on the first floor and mine lived on the second. One day the wife came up to have coffee with my mother. I told the wife that my mom laid on the floor to hear the couple’s fights better.

My god, where do I start...

This movie came out my freshman year of high school and I ABSOLUTELY credit it with the confidence my too-smart bff and I had to be too-smart girls who dgaf what anyone else was doing. It’s a perfect movie that I can quote start to finish.

I’ve got about 5-8 of these types of hairs around both of my nipples since puberty. I pluck these off my body when they get mad long every 1.5-2 months. I’m also South Asian, so “unwanted” body hair is basically my are(ola) of expertise.

I have a lot of nipple hairs if I don’t pluck them

Melania’s heavy eye makeup doesn’t do her any favors.  I wish someone would have a heart to heart with her.  Chat with Sarah Jessica Parker, as well.  With both of them, the heavy dark colors make their eyes look smaller.

In any case, dorm dumpster divers are about to hit the MOTHERLODE!

Unknowing or not, they should not benefit from their parents’ fraud. They’re still taking a spot from a student who actually earned it. If your parents steal a car and gift it to you, you don’t get to keep it when the theft is discovered. 

My mom was a soap opera writer early in her career, and a number of my mother’s friends thought it was positively scandalous that I would sometimes hang out on the set as a teenager. As if seeing the choreographed awkwardness of simulated sex would give me ideas.