I’ve been lusting after a deuce and a half, but then I remember without power steering there’s no way I could steer it (bad back), I know nothing about diesels, and there’s absolutely nothing in my life for which it would be sufficiently useful to be worth the trouble.

Even as someone who passionately prefers a stick shift, I find your anger perplexing.

Another little known fact is that if you quickly double tap the gas pedal while accelerating you get flames out of the exhaust and a turbo boost even if your car doesn’t have a turbo.

Idiots who have the right of way that stop and try to wave me on, even though I do not have the right of way.

Ugh, where to begin? It’s the “me first” mentality of really not thinking about anything else on the road.

Adjust you mirror so there is no blind spot. If I can see your face in you left rear view when directly behind you at a stoplight it’s wrong.

Pass me, then cut in front and slow down - when I’m on cruise control in the right lane.

Lane camping on highways.

Stop pacing the semi in the right lane doing 65 and just execute the pass. There are 15 cars behind you that aren’t worried about getting a speeding ticket. Move over.

The turkeys have her now.

Jesus that’s depressing

Seen it. Covered it.

Pretty soon that will be a Farmer’s Insurance ad.

I was getting on the freeway to go to a date a few years ago and a duck landed right in front of me. I swerved around the body, but clipped its beak with my fender. I looked back at it in my mirror to see its head spinning like a top as it collapsed on the road. It was a heavy handed metaphor for how the date would…

Blessed be the poor insurance adjuster trying to figure out how organize the paperwork on that one. 

When I worked at a RV dealership, we had an interesting repair come in: A couple was driving down the highway in their pickup with a 25+ft 5th wheel trailer behind them (like a semi trailer hitch). They hit a deer and it flipped over the cab and landed in their pickup bed (they had a push bar on the front of the…

Please, this was probably accomplished with a couple unpaid summer interns given the question “where else can we use our technology?” because they got more interns than they actually needed.

Did you invade her Normandy under the cover of darkness?

I need this so bad. My girlfriend is the absolute worst. I feel like the british getting forced off of europe at dunkirk.

That’s not an Audi, it’s some sort of BMW/Tesla combination. Ask Mahk.

..profanity laws are bullshit...