I’ve already seen “I got it and survived, so brown people with more comorbidity than me better shut the fuck up” attitudes out there, so no. These assholes are just like Steve “I got shot but losing NRA money hurts more” Scalise.

[Frodo and Samwise basically walk into Mordor, because the giant spider turns out to be a wuss and Sauron put the dumbest orcs in charge of guarding the back door]

Is...is that some other undiscovered Kardashian, or some hanger-on, or neighbor or some shit? I can’t even tell these people apart anymore.

Which reaffirms cops only view things in terms of transactional power.

Quoting Thelma & Louise: “You can park a Chevy under the shadow of his ass.”

In a Sam’s Club, they don’t let you out the door without checking receipts on any goods you’re carrying. When they returned for a refund they won’t get shit unless they also bring back the receipt.

I read that as “18,000 public lice”, and now I have yet another unrequited wish.

The day he dies I'm definitely partying like an Ewok at the end of Return of the Jedi. All hair, no pants.

They are literally in Miami, Florida, where a sizable portion of the population have ties to Cuba, PR, Venzuela, or other Spanish-speaking nation.

I figured old Ted has been giving those voice overs to his kids while preparing the kill room in his basement.

How much are you willing to bet that Dr. Ronnie "Feelgood" Jackson has been giving him sugar pills and said 'Yeah that's definitely hydroxychloroquine. I also cut it with some primo Clorox, man. Far out!'

That lady behind him almost got her eyes rolled all the way to her right ear.

You know this is a choice motherfucker when his own boss, whom he helped won the presidency, calls him Turd Blossom.

“This is police brutality”

The shape of the voting district around Asheville, NC was the reason there’s a gerrymandering lawsuit a few years back.

Just use the McMichael Rule and add some ventilation to that hood.

The Matrix has good things going for it.

“It’s totally okay when you sing along and the song has it though.”

The latter bunch are assholes who disregard the safety of others. I’m not opposed to jail time, since they like to seek out thrilling dangerous situations.

^ This is the correct take. Dogs are gullible as fuck. Love ‘em both though.