When I see fancy trains now, my first thought is almost always “where do they stick the maintenance children?”

This is a common tactic of certain people who think that throwing unrelated issues into an argument makes their argument stronger.

I’ll donate $ 20 to the candidate who refers to Bloomberg on the debate tonight as “Wannabe Jussie Smollett”.

The bank really wants to be my former bank?

I call this look: “Medusa trying to pick her nose”

Its predecessor, once removed, “But why can black people say it?”, remains stubborn as fuck.

Can’t wait to go on a road trip in my brand new Planck-series dual motor Heisenberg.

Honestly, I think that the jury may have been horse-trading a bit where the majority will accept the not guilty on the predatory charges to get the holdouts to agree to guilty on these other charges.

In better news: Weinstein Found Guilty

The passage with Taraji P. Henson’s quote about having a dream stolen is one of the reasons Dr. Harris and her colleagues need to be celebrated.

I didn't know they stacked Rohypnol that high.

I’m starring your comment specifically for using proper plural and singular terms for lice.

I’ll believe Russia is really helping Sanders when Trump stops kissing (kind words, stifling policies, etc.) Putin’s ass.

Someone should remind Fox & Friends to mention that Trump has fewer Oscars than Obama, Spike, Jordan Peele and Kobe.

I figured R Kelly is more his speed.

Why not just change it to Sussex Royale With Cheese?

Can we get the other candidates on the debate stage to agree to always use the term “another Republican trying to buy an election" whenever they refer to Bloomberg?

Maybe we need to extend a helping hand for her and call an exorcist to chase away the ghost of 1997-radio-show-Mike Pence from her body?

You guys should definitely reccomend some new candidates for Conde Naste leadership if this is what they’re after.

They can’t break with the precedent from the landmark case of La-La-La-Can’t-Hear-You v. Mom.