They’re white, so of course Trump would pardon them.

OH MY GOD.

We once had a petting zoo visit the library and they had snakes and spiders to show the kids. One of the handlers was walking along the line of children with an ENORMOUS jumping spider in a box. I turned to my colleague and said “If it’s a jumping spider shouldn’t the box have a lid?” At that moment the spider decides…

Did she need a face transplant because I would have clawed my own fucking face off

That’s how the movie ends. Spider to the face and a cut to black. Roll credits.

In 1989, my godmother was taking a shower, when she looked up and saw a huntsman spider roughly the size of a dinner plate right above her head. She thought, ‘no worries, I will just calmly and quietly finish up this shower before he has a chance to move.’ Right at that moment, the Newcastle earthquake stuck, rattling…

I’m in Mexico City. El Popo sends a lot of ashes constantly but it’s never been a threat to Mexico City, as it’s pretty far away from an explosion. The earthquake thing was true but the recent one was tragic and it’s total BS that he’s using a tragedy as an excuse to trash the place. If somebody said the same thing…

It’s about the same distance as Rainier is from Seattle, just because it’s Mexican doesn’t make it scary.

As a mom there are a number of things I would like to include in the “bad for the environment” category so that I can keep them out of my house: Moon sand, Calliou, the JuJuBeads on Beets song (played on repeat), super glue, playgrounds with tiny stones, sand boxes, slime and play dough, Takis (for the kid not me),…

I really like veggies for breakfast, too. Eggs scrambled with various veggies and topped with salsa and a little cheese is my favorite. Or eggs with a sliced tomato on the side.

Don’t shame women for survival work. Your comment only helps perpetuate the devaluing of sex workers. Women will rely on survival work as long as we suffer sexism, racism, colorism, transphobia. Fix that instead of calling sex workers “gross.” Come the fuck on.

Given that the Navy is filled with sea men, the penis seems legit.

Lord knows that when I look back on all the women I’ve loved, I primarily think about the men they worked for.

Boy, those Trumpanzees sure are fragile little snowflakes, aren’t they?

I want to star this but then there wouldn’t be 69 anymore and I don’t want to be responsible for that.

Shouldn’t it be a “Cocktrail”

Wow. Both people in omak saw it!

If this was an Air Force pilot, one could argue he was merely living up to the USAF fight song. You know...

My Dad and Mom adopted me when they were 56. My Dad died of pancreatic cancer at 71. They saved my life when they adopted me and gave me everything they could. Before you make judgments about parents being too old and cheating children of life you should probably not. Everyone’s life is different but I’ve seen younger…

What? You are under the impression that every single woman can find a partner who wants to father her children (that presumably she also doesn’t find repellent)? What a bizarre assumption. Completely false.