Well, I guess when you already have a racist mascot, rape jokes are one of the few avenues left to you to make things even more offensive.

How can it possibly be worse than Blue Mommy???

eh, not as scary as werewolf bar mitzvah - spooky, scary

Yes! Do we agree that this mannequin CAN GET IT?

So great! I also think that Madeline and Katy Perry as soulmates is now the only acceptable outcome of the love spell!

Call me a snob, but when I die, I demand cold brew at the very least.

Great article! Also, Madeleine, aren't you a little worried that you fucked around with the occult and now you're going to end up becoming soulmates with Katy Perry? I'd avoid cherry chapstick for the next 8-10 months if I were you.

actually if you bring ME somewhere and give me a coloring book i will also be quiet and well-behaved.

I don't mind the *existence* of babies at brunch/bars/restaurants/movies at all, as long as a) you don't expect me to alter my adult behavior, and b) if your baby starts screaming (not crying, but that ear-piercing screaming) you get the fuck out of there and try to calm that heathen down before you rejoin society.

I stopped reading this when you said that your favorite Hanson brother was Isaac. Isaac?! Are you fucking serious Mark?? Everyone knows the hotness order was Taylor, Zack, then Isaac. I feel like I don't even know you any more.

That's amazing! I'm totally co-opting it!

Although I agree that we don't need just one word I would also like to say that I'm built just like your friend and would like to nominate amazon- my most common descriptor. Not sure if those are dependent on the fact that I'm also tall though...

If people would just admit their attractions, it would make life easier for everyone. Feeding the idiotic rigidly-defined standards of beauty are seriously not helpful to anyone.

Lots of roving bachelorette parties on the streets of your town, are there?

Yeah, the "I talked to some women I know and they said you're wrong" is just the best, right?

Everything you just watched in this video is NOT OK. How's that for a start?

Because I felt threatened. Sorry if I didn't use the most politically correct language while I was being threatened.

Because it was the heat of the moment. I cursed at him too. Or is that okay with you?

Because black men, regardless of race or class benefit from male privilege.

Because when this black man harassed me,…

you said you were going to send his black ass to jail. hmmm yeah, that a great way to make the situation worse. also, who the hell cares what color his ass is?

Italy exists.