I remember them saying that too! And I was like, wtf kinda shots go in your stomach?

This shouldn’t make me snicker. But it does.

Raccoons are the biggest reservoir for rabies in the United States.

Yeeaaaah, around where I live raccoons are known for killing pet cats, dogs, and rabbits.

I’ve seen it happen IRL when I worked at the hospital. And families will undermine like crazy to try to override spouses or POAs.

I got a bigger refund after getting married. Larger deductible.

I suggested marriage to my husband when I realized that my father would be my next of kin. We’d already been together for several years so it’s not like we didn’t know each other.

I married the current husband so my father wouldn’t be my automatic next of kin if I was seriously injured.

You’re supposed to sing the succubus’ song backwards to them to escape their grasp.

I find this so, so weird.

I counter with motherfucking Pat Toomey.

Oh yes they do. See: Pennsylvania.

It’s more a rural vs urban/suburban thing then regional, in my experience.

Someone doesn’t understand wtf a disability is, does she?

That is absolute bullshit.

I like his friend.

Ok, this actually looks good.

God is laughing at us all, his antennae bobbing.

But, but what if I literally just want a cheese pizza? WHAT THEN TWITTER?!

It’s so beautiful.