No oranges allowed!

Yeah, I LOL’ed. Not entirely inaccurate but also incredibly pretentious.

Nah, the best part is when the Italian lawyer derisively speaks of the American media trying to teach him law, and says that in 1308, there was a law school in Italy, while in 1308, in America, people were drawing bisons on cave walls.

WHY AREN’T ALL THE COMMENTS ON THIS PIECE IN THE TONE SET BY THE CONTENT? THE WHISPER TYPING SEEMS VERY OUT OF PLACE.

WHAT??? I CAN’T HEAR YOU!!!

IT SEEMS REALLY AGRESSIVE, RIGHT!?

BITCH, QUIT YELLING.

About as much consideration as Teresa Halbach got in the Avery doc, I’d say.

I’m burning with jealousy. Decca was by far the best Mitford sister.

Fun facts: JK Rowling named her daughter after Decca. Also, Jessica’s investigative reporting (especially the American Way of Death) led to some changes in the funeral industry. Hillary Clinton interned with Bob Treuhaus, Decca’s second husband. And I met her three times! Three! She told me I was a lovely girl.

They’re not that stupid. Committing a crime that would potentially result in being denied visas to visit in the future isn’t worth it, when fashion is so much of their brand.

A publicity stunt that could lead to serious criminal charges? I don’t think so. It’s Paris, they could have some up with all sorts of stunts that didn’t involve “filing a false police report”.

1) The Muse is the part of Jezebel that posts about music, television, movies. etc. 2) “Celebrity, Sex, Fashion for Women. Without Airbrushing.” is the tagline of Jezebel. 3) Tags are your friend.

Did you actually read what was written, or did you just click on the headline and comment? Because this was directly addressed.

SAY SOMETHING ABOUT RIH’S DREADS, GIULIANA, I FUCKING DARE YOU

A serious jewelry heist wasn’t planned a couple hours ahead of time because some dudes saw her snapchats. I’m sure this was planned well well in advance using higher intelligence than some filtered pics.

Look, how else is a man supposed to compliment his daughter when the only compliments he knows how to give any woman are that he finds her attractive enough to have sex with?

You know, the guy’s a buffoon. A lout. The kind of guy who yells at the waiter because his Borscht isn’t hot. The sort of simpleton who hears Nietzche and says “Gesundheit”. The kind of neanderthal who’d bomb us back to the stone age just so he could have an intellectual discussion.

Oh man. I need to up my game!

I’m a strong proponent of the shower beer, but you have to drink it pretty fast.