Kansas City International is smaller but it's also nice. You can arrive twelve minutes before your flight boards and still be at the gate in time. Denver is atrocious.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.. wait a minute.

I recently had to explain to my 5-year-old nephew that we were fast-forwarding through the giant spider scene because it "scares the bejeezus out of Aunt Sarah." Sorry, kid.

Bette Midler is on my list of "Women With Whom I'd Die to Have a Six-Cocktail Brunch." Also on the list—Goldie Hawn, Michelle Obama, Elaine Stritch, MERYL (duh), and Julia Louis-Dreyfus.

I just had to IMDB that to be sure. Headsplosion. I've seen that movie a million times and never made that connection.

Because it's the best movie family of all time? I knew it, too. Don't worry.

Jeah he is.

You beat me to it. I was about to comment about this. I'm pretty sure that IS a Razr—I have no idea where you'd even buy one of those things after 2005.

Aww :) Glad someone else can relate.

I fell in love with her when she was Karen in season three of The Office. As much as you WANT to dislike her character because of the Jim/Pam thing, you really can't help but adore her. If you get the chance, check out Parks & Rec because it's amazing!

My automatic marry is Mariska Hargitay, followed closely by Sara Ramirez. But you're right, Beyonce is basically perfect.

Um, have you guys been following the Twitter exchange between Chris Brown and Jenny Johnson (@jennyjohnsonhi5)? Highlight of my day. CB's Twitter account is currently down. I'm sure there will be a post on Jez tomorrow about it, but HOLY SHIT. I love Jenny Johnson.

Yeessss. Good for you. Don't you love that first "single again" makeout?

Right? I used to live in a city with several, one of which was near my apartment. Something about the smell of used book stores is so much more satisfying than B&N or Borders (r.i.p.). I could spend all day in a used book store.

Embarrassingly, I just had to Google Image "Sasha Obama" because for a split second I thought she was the older one. I mean, I KNEW it, but I doubted myself for a second. I wonder where Michelle was? Probably doing something completely awesome. Ugh, I love them.

Exactly. A few people in our class tried to organize one but it didn't pan out. I graduated high school in '04 so we were all on Facebook. A reunion would have been 100 people (assuming a quarter of the class would show up) standing around asking what we've all been "up to" even though they already knew. I'm still…

*University of Missouri-Kansas City

Agreed. I've been on eight (yes, eight) first meetings from OKC or Match—I also try not to treat them as dates. My mistake is that I've almost always had a few drinks at home to calm my nerves, but it never works. Coffee is perfect for the initial meet. Worst case scenario, it's a half-hour of boring conversation and…

Um, ew. Update: She tweeted the following earlier today...

Victoria Jackson is almost TOO easy to troll on Twitter, you guys.