PARANOIA?? I don’t know who that is. But I could call her for you quick.

Acid? What acid? Oh, look at that, now there’s actual demons driving the little Demons.

How cool would it be if you took off the supercharger of a Demon and opened it only to realize it was actually just a Micro Machines factory with a bunch of toy Dodge Demons.

Rods rigorously running rather righteously!

The Majestic Maxyenko Made a Mildly Malicious Melody

The Real Rally Rascal Racers Revving Resonant Raspy Rides.

They brought some much-needed excitement to Cadillac’s lineup, but they also didn’t do much for sales of Cadillac’s other cars.

Oh, for sure. This game really stood out to me and my friends at the time. I feel like a lot of GameCube games get a little neglected.  

It’s actually amazing how well this game has aged. The reflexes required to get good at this game are so intense. This is one of the only games that has genuinely made me motion sick.

Oh, but of course. But I prefer fuel sourced from free-range, organic animals. The exotic beasts in the game preserve are strictly meant as my own table fare.

Pretty sure I’ve played this game before, McLaren.

I love this thing. I love that it exists, and I love that somebody thought of it. But... How does it even turn at all?

Oh, you must. It removes any doubt among your service staff where you stand in the world at all times.

Ah, yes. Nothing less will do once you’ve felt the supple surface of suckling seal skin.

SILENCE! We Wealths have no use for “facts” or “educated opinions” or “being technically correct.”

Yes, Kristen, I do pick my own bones. Because some of us Wealths still prefer the old-fashioned ritual of looking our fuel in the face.

Oh, PLEASE, call ME when the engine block is forged out of a single block of solid diamond and runs off of gasoline produced by the forced degradation and heated compression of zebra bones from animals I pick myself.

How far my standards have fallen... Five years ago, I would have wrinkled up my face in disgust at this and written angry words on the internet.

Oh yeah, that’s right. I forgot about that. Didn’t that one come with basically no interior comforts, whatsoever? Even less than a normal Evo? Like, no air conditioning or power anything

‘Ey, where’d the wing go? This shmuck thinks ya can just sell ya rolling toilet of an Evo without the goddamn wing? Get the fahk atta heeea.