How do you feel about chili garlic sauce? Because I am not a sriracha fan, but Huy Fong chili garlic sauce is pretty damn awesome. It's my secret guacamole ingredient.

I had this same experience with a client a few weeks ago. She can be kind of difficult and we were talking about something not related to her account. I expressed a sentiment and she said "You know...that's really smart. Because I think the same thing." She was completely oblivious to what she had just said. It was…

I get your point. You do not get what literally hundreds of women are telling you in the comments.

So the Jezebel main page isn't following me, and I'm in the greys. This is after being a commenter since 2007 and in the blacks/starred since 2009. Really Jezebel? Ohhhkay.

It is amazing how many women are telling you, in their personal, lived experience that this is big deal, yet you persist in telling them that their experience is wrong. Because you, as a man, clearly know their experiences better than they do. Bravo sir. Bravo.

What the fuck is it about the west loop and douchebros? So. Many. Douchebros.

I really like knowing the strain because they have different effects bit buying in bulk? Fuck that. I'm a grown up with a job and I can't be high all the time. A little toke now and then and I'm good.

Carol Burnett is a god damn national treasure. She must live forever.

I will not. I submit that this troll is extremely entertaining and delightful in its trolliness. Do not cross me. You know what happens to students who tell lies.

You are the best troll to ever troll. 100 points for Slytherin!

I give you baby otter. You give me pugs now.

Well...tell him the truth, to the extent that you want to. You can tell him that when he wrapped his hands around your neck, it triggered a bad past experience, so please don't do that again. You can also not say anything more than that. You don't have to tell him anything more than you want to.

Oh dear god. Dead before morning.

This email has been floating around for years. I got it years ago, almost word for word. It was stupid then too.

That room is way too small for that much charisma.

I think it's weird, but I don't think that matters. If you don't like it, that's what's important. Sounds like it's time to set some boundaries.

This is exactly what a cute animal video should be. Cute animals. Happy owners. Sounds of cute animals and happy owners. NO TERRIBLE MUSIC!

DO THOSE NOTHING BURGERS HAVE LENTILS? I ONLY EAT LENTIL NOTHING BURGERS.