I'll stick to my patented Skinner burgers. Old family recipe.

TL;DR: Are there no prisons? Are there no workhouses?

Everyone in the NYT editor's room has their head head shoved up their ass. 

Trump to supporters: Democracy is bad

Top notch Splinter content.

Biden's plan is crap. It leaves huge gaps in coverage. It's more expensive for more people. It's incredibly vulnerable to Republican attack. But if we don't go with Biden's plan Obama will feel sad because his legacy will be destroyed or something? So Biden it is. I sure don't want Obama to feel sad. Sorry everyone…

Joe Walsh is less offended by Trump then he is incredibly jealous of Trump stealing his racist, ignorant schtick.

So we got the barf list which, don’t get me wrong, is all I hoped it would be and more. But. Bryce Harper named his child Krew. Krew. That’s not a nickname. Krew Harper. It's like he named his child Krew in order to dare Deadspin to mock a newborn.

Same

“Fuck Yuengling”

If you’re the kind of person who would tweet mean things at Susan Sarandon’s dog then you’re also the kind if person who would vote for Trump over Bernie and then lie about it later on MSNBC.

Hillary and Robby Mook didn’t think she needed those people to win. She didn't do anything to get their vote. In fact, her campaign strategy was exactly the opposite. She went after Republican votes instead, thus alienating those Bernie voters.

Hillary’s election strategy was to court “moderate” Republicans. This strategy backfired. That is why she lost.

I’m genuinely curious if at some point before Iowa the media will turn completely against Biden. 

Wrong. The only course of action to take to scream at and insult anybody who supported Sanders in 2016 regardless of who they voted for in the GE. If we call them Bernie Bros, purity trolls, and traitors enough times they'll definitely see reason and agree to cancel the primaries and coronate Biden (or Buttigieg if…

And the stupidest answer yet comes from Mr. Smarty Pants himself. What’s Norwegian for “pseudointellectual"?

This Tik Tok 2020

Because the CEO of Aetna needs a new yacht.

“...have cultures as diverse as ours...”