+1 subtle change to the Kansas City Royal’s piping.

Not Paul Lukas!

Imagine thinking teenagers don’t know about horny memes

Oh the kids definitely know where it comes from lolol 

The old Woody Allen line needs an update:

Management Stooge #1: Man, I really don’t want to lead this meeting. Telling half the staff they are fired is going to be terrible. You got lucky.

“Authentic Brand Groups” would be too obvious for a writers’ room.

they should probably start the layoffs with their fucking HR department, because they sound hideous. 

Alice Doesn’t Live Here Anymore literally was a box office hit that won its lead actress an Oscar. You want to come up with a better defense than that? Boxcar Bertha also made a ton of money and got Barbara Hershey an Oscar nod to boot. I could go on but you get the idea.

We’ve removed that clause and issued a correction.

“Yeah, but what about every Scorcese film?”

If memory serves, it was the shooter himself who claimed to be “inspired” by the Joker, mainly as a smarmy legal strategy; hoping that a careless jury and/or media would blame the source material for his brutal crime. Luckily, the tactic didn’t save his sorry ass, but some lazy people still play along whenever the…

“...including the one that donned the costume of The Joker himself before opening fire on an Aurora auditorium:”

Our (male) sideline reporter has been with the team for many years and got a couple purposeful, direct shots... but he sure as hell didn’t have multiple men dumping entire bottles on his head.

If there is a baseline between exuberant celebration and disturbingly degrading behavior, these videos are a slow roller toward first that might not stay in fair territory.

I think this says as much about his soggy reflexes as anything because I’d have been under the fucking desk in the time it takes him to roll away from that huge fucking annoyed bird

From the Guardian piece linked:

I think it’s more likely that someone DID think through these cameras.

(1/3) We are deeply saddened to announce that Aurora died earlier today. Aurora was the Academy’s longest serving live mascot. In her 23 years at USAFA, she interacted with tens of thousands of people at sporting venues and military and community events.