I mean... if I knew someone was freaking out over a nonexistent vagina on a teddy bear cake, I might tease Mrs. Overreaction too. But then, I’m not the kind of person you probably want at a child’s christening in the first place.

God, that scene where he’s paging through his scrapbook of photos of happy families cut from magazines, cos he’s got no one to call his own... So sad. Very cry.

For those of you on the fence, I’d like to remind you of his delightfully raspy voice.

I set my own limits. $1,000 is not $2,000. And I like to have nice things. Sue me.

My dude and I had dated loooong ago. Freshman year of college. Then I dumped him for lame 18-year-old-girl reasons, and we lost touch. We both married other people who turned out to be horrible (in shockingly similar, really terrible ways. Like drug abuse and incest.) After we both got divorced, we found each other…

And really, isn’t it just a decent thing to do? Excuse my commie pinko-ness, but it seems like if you have a ridiculous amount of cash flow and it’s barely going to make a dent, why not tip generously? I love her and all, but bottom line, if you look at tips as percentages of someone’s income, I'm sure there a regular…

The thing is, there’s cheap wine and then there’s cheap wine.

“And if you pause here, you can actually see his heart break.”

We live in a city that has gorgeous views of the Canadian Rockies and every day I get a little bit of joy looking at them out my office window. (Okay, not today, it’s cloudy and raining) I try to share that with the kids when we’re driving around town and you can see the mountains over the horizon, I get all “Guys…

I totally get it as a joke! I’ve never called my dogs “used,” but god knows I spend plenty of time telling my dumb-as-a-box-of-hammers Yorkie mix exactly how dumb she is, while she bounces and yips in delight and wags her tail so hard it looks like it’s going to fly off.

Life at fancy real life firms is nothing like TV. No one wants to watch hours of document review, redlining agreements and recruiting committee meetings.

I’d like to add, “wears a suit that requires cuff-links,” because cuff-links are hot.

Paul Simon’s Graceland is both a great album and a problematic album, but I love it nonetheless. Boy in the Bubble might actually be my favourite song from the album for its lyrics and positive atmosphere.

Yes! re: Anthro. I used to tell my husband that if I had to choose one store to shop at and couldn’t shop anywhere else it would be Anthro, but now it would look like I was trying to do business casual Coachella if that were the case.

I really don’t like people going “poor Sansa!” over this. She...god, there is no way to say it without sounding awful, so let me just skip ahead.

Summer dresses and cardigans. Just a side note that businesses in hot weather climates often keep their ACs effing COLD! So you need the sundress for outside but the cardigan for inside.

Stassa, please fix the penultimate thing - I’m cringing with embarrassment for you right now.

As a fat athlete (yes,athlete. I have played roller derby, which is Full Contact and very physically demanding, for 5 years) I have felt the sting of fat shaming. The first season I was able to make the roster, someone posted a very unflattering picture of me on Facebook captioned,” if that jammer was a cheeseburger…

I guess a lot of women must love tankinis, but I feel like they solve the wrong problem for me. I don’t care about my stomach, I want the bottoms to be shorts is all. So I don’t have to spend 45 minutes shaving everything. Less up top, more down bottom.

I’m getting married THIS SATURDAY (which begs the question: why on earth am I on Jezebel with about a thousand last minute things to do? but I digress) and both of our dogs are in the ceremony. My dog is wearing a big bow and her dog is wearing a polka dotted bowtie which matches the other bowtie wearing members of…