You don't know the half of it…

Gaaaaaaargh! Xenu will NOT stand for this! The puny man-animals of Teegeeack will find themselves regretting the day that they shoot one FRAME of that notorious Hubbardite attempting to fend off an invasion of that pathetic planet!

Yes, his Thetans need another round of the Wall of Fire. Xenu will get someone right on that. It will be a pleasure.

Joseph Smith was always, in the end, a pussy.

Finally, someone on Teegeeack gets it!

Hubbard was a plodder. What do you expect?

Don't think that's going to help…

You tell 'em, clam!

Bleah. Pathetic man-animals. Orion Fried Chicken is much better. It's cooked in dark energy.

Don't you fucking start, clam…

Feh. Xenu suppresses whomever he likes, whenever he likes.  Get used to it, clams.

Indeed. In recognition of your knowledge, Xenu will subject you to one LESS minute of torment in the coming year!

Those would be DC-8s, clam!

Of course not. THAT planet is fictional. THIS planet is real. All TOO real!!

Inhabitants of Teegeeack! You are hereby instructed to AVOID THIS TELEVISION PROGRAM AT ALL COSTS!!! Any man-animals found viewing this program, should it be broadcast, will be exiled to Planet Hollywood. No, not the celebrity-themed restaurant. An actual planet inhabited entirely by would-be television writers,…

No fucking shit. O'Neal is going to have an unpleasant surprise waiting for him when he returns home tonight from his drunken carousing. Oh yes… very unpleasant.  MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

"Ice Road Octuplets"! That's the political news you clams want! And that's the political news you deserve!

Xenu has edited his post! NOW who looks the fool, Boreanaz?  Not Xenu!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Only the horns of space-rhinos from Serengeti VI.

Oh for the space-love of… does anyone on Teegeeack actually believe this bullshit? This is just the Hubbard cult trying to "prove" that they can give their members special powers.