Actually shitting on shit wouldn’t be that exciting in the end.  

“de minimis” is the stage name of the stripper that Hannity allegedly knocked up.  

Season Nine will start with a sudden shift to Los Angeles, where we will concentrate with a few people dealing with the very start of the zombie outbreak. We will then skip over the whole outbreak and downfall of civilization, kill off the few characters anyone likes, and move the annoying characters left to Mexico,…

When Fallon finally leaves The Tonight Show, will anyone shed a tear?

Can we all agree that Zergnet is the worse advertiser on the internet? I’d rather have all catheter ads than Zergnet’s annoying, have to jump through fifty pagest to get to the content stuff.

That’s so speciesist.  Do you think missionaries only have sex in missionary position? 

Yep, Netflix is pulling out of Cannes

Sadly, he could not.

Damn it all, I can’t resist.

In the near future, a meteorite strikes in Las Vegas, destroying the Sphinx at the Luxor hotel, and unleashing numerous purple eggs, that then release purple CGI snakes that start to climb the Luxor Pyramid. Then the two alien commanders, Ugg and Wrongway (John Malkovich and Sigourney Weaver), climb out of the crater…

“Warrior needs food, and sex, badly”

It is best for all of society that we forget that movie, and simply tell ourselves that the Futurama episode where Fry battles the video games is the only story like that ever.

Scene: Sunset. The Smoldering Ruins of San Diego frame Leroy and Juanita. Their clothes are in ruin, tattered and dirty. The only sound is a dry wind blowing by.

Is there a Rock, Paper, Scissors demon? A Hot Potato demon? A Beer Pong demon? Does Hell spawn out a new demon as soon as kids think up some silly game/drinking distraction?

“the devil likes Guerrero’s style, so they keep the partnership going, because everyone wants a franchise these days.”

Has no one watched South Park?  Everyone knows you go with “Dare” if you want the girl to kiss you.  

I always prefer the classics.  You are not a real monster until you have stomped on Tokyo.  

He should at least eat dynamite and belch fire.  

There is nothing wrong with saying “It’s a stupid movie that makes little sense, but it’s fun!”  We need more movies like that.  What is amazing about today’s Hollywood is that they do so badly with stupid fun movies.  

“I learned it from watching Rampage with you Dad!  I learned it from you!”