Tesla’s price-to-earnings ratio — a comparison of share price to earnings per share — is roughly 128X to the industry average of 15X, according to Zacks Investment Research. Based on that ratio, it would take Tesla 1,600 years to make the kind of money the stock market says it’s worth.

I’m guessing there’s a Jalop in Japan who could take a look at it for you for a modest fee? Just as everywhere else in the world, the used cars slated for export tend to be the worst ones. And organized crime has a big hand in the junk car / export car business in Japan.

Cut back on the Boys’ Life.

The “love smoking” bit is probably a few decades old, but yes, they do smoke a lot more tobacco than Americans do.

Aftermarket battery-powered accessories compete with BMW items. They’d rather have you order an option, or buy a new BMW, instead of mounting/using a separate device.

Pre-installed music selections?

Pull on your car stereo’s volume knob. If it easily comes off, previous owner was a meth smoker. That’s where they keep their stash. Ask me how I know! (No, try again.)

I paid a moonlighting rental car company cleaning guy $200 to try to get rid of smoke smell from a Lexus I’d inherited. He said rental companies are experts at it. He did manage to get rid of about 90% of the smell, and I told the story in the eBay listing. 

Smokers don’t notice, though.

My W126 S Class has them.

Um. I hope she’s, like, five.

Then we’ll get the chorus of “enthusiasts” to decry anyone who wants a storage cubby in their Porsche. Because of course, if those “enthusiasts” ever saved up enough for a Porsche from their aluminum recycling and online surveys, they would spend every day at the track, naked.

Well then where are you supposed to get a power bottom?

Mercedes is singlehandedly reviving Jalopnik. 

Speaking of triumph, it's going to be a very fun four years. 

Skodas and Triumphs and Tatras and Nissans and Coneys and Messerschmitts

Well, somebody has to buy Corvettes. 

That must’ve been a special episode of Full House?

I prefer the original version, by Coldplay.

C’est la vie, say the old folks,
It goes to show you never can tell.