Yeah that is wayyyy too much sidebar.

For comparison, the Barbie Car (5mph) goes about 1.6x as fast as walking (~3.1mph, according to Wikipedia), and I can only imagine the horrible backaches you’d get as an adult sitting in a toy car meant for children.

While we’re talking untoward behavior, don’t forget that Kim worked as a Deputy Rowan County Clerk under her mother for twenty-something years. It’s a family business.

Seriously. My brother moved back in for a few years after college, and my mom gave him a monthly room and board bill.

It’s the famous person equivalent of handing a friend a Netflix envelope with the Blu-ray of Interstellar inside and saying, “Happy birthday!”

re (2): what’s that (possibly apocryphal) saying? Loan someone a million dollars, you own them; loan somebody a trillion dollars, they own you.

Yeah, I want to see how this relates to where you live. I grew up in Chicago, and my ranking there is:

Yeah, I had that thought. It also occurred to me that this ad was targeted to old people, who are notoriously bad at spotting scams.

I can’t believe it’s 2015 and there are people in this world who haven’t heard of Jan Brewer reverse image search.

In order to profit, they’d need someone to actually *click* on one of these weak-ass excuses for ads.

Of course Illinois Republicans are doing this at a Rams game, not a Bears game.

Hoover Tower at Stanford is a dick with a condom on. (note the reservoir tip)

It’s like anti-union rhetoric extended to the parent-teacher relationship.

That was AP US History for me. I was a huge history nerd, so whenever the teacher would try to shame me by waking me up and asking me a question about whatever he had just been talking about, I would give the right answer.

Ask them how much a banana costs!

Dad passed away when I was in high school, and in an effort to make sure my brother and I would still get to see our half-siblings, my mom would regularly take us over to have dinner at my stepmom’s house. Stepmom got pretty religious after Dad died, and didn’t yet know that I’m a godless heathen, so she had some…

A friend of mine got caught with pot at school when I was a junior in high school. He was the lead guitarist in my band, and we were scheduled to play a much-anticipated set at the local college radio station that day after school. But now our guitarist was in jail.

No comment on the fact that Idaho’s top “liquor” is a three-way tie between Fireball, Captain Morgan, and Jagermeister?

I’m convinced Fireball is at least partially a troll drink.

Yeah I have puked on a toothbrush before.