Sounds like a pretty lazy and poorly executed hoax.

I think they just have cookies there

Also of note, walking four times sets a one-day record for people who live in Ohio.

What’s so scary, Barry? If he goes off the edge he’s just going to hover.

Misunderstood...

Impossible Germany, unlikely Sudan.

“Sandoval has one walk and no hits in seven plate appearances this season.”

Right?! Like, “I celebrated my love in this super ahead of it’s time OG hipster way and now anyone that tries to do that is posing and anyone that doesn’t try to do that is a Scrooge McDuck evil rich person who doesn’t truly understand love”.

You sound both pretentious and bitter.

How is this even a first round series to begin with? They had the 2nd and 3rd most points in the Western Conference, and the 3rd and 5th most in the entire NHL. But hey, they play in the same division so let’s make them first round opponents...? Great system, hockey.

I could’ve told you this months ago. Me and my 15 year old friends only use Snap Chat to talk.

Going to the bear spa certainly looks more relaxing than what I’ve seen of seal clubbing.

I actually used to work in the gift shop of a bear spa. Well, it was more than a gift shop, it had toiletries and stuff for the bears. You know in case the bears forgot anything. Or if they liked a product we used, they could take it back to the den with them. As much as we liked to provide a relaxing atmosphere for…

It really shows you how far goverment is starting to reach.

You think you’re the shit, aren’t you?

Uh, think you mean “baadh”.

A lot of people will tell you that the color guard is a collection of kind of sad young ladies who contribute nothing to the band or the team.

Are you a man, or an actual finger?

Whether or not Colin Kaepernick feels comfortable around Chip Kelly probably depends on how well lit the room is.