Me! Fuck you and all that trailer park noise, F-bodys are my shit! They’re easy to tune, look like TRON cars and piss people like you off, that’s worth 20 bands to me! 

Oh, it gets worse...

Come on, fam

See also: MAGICAL NEGRO

No, it’s THE BEST commercial period because FUCK CHRISTOPHER REID! Did you forget?...

A taco is a sandwich, just like a burger or a hot dog. Meat plus bread, minus bowl, equals sandwich! It's simple math. 

I couldn't find the words so I found the GIFS. Never change, Damon! NEVER!!!

Bruh, stop clicking that Deadspin shit. They fired the REAL staff, disabled Kinja and now they just got a bunch of fuckheads in there cooking up hot takes with no seasoning, grease, or SOS pads. It’s a bullshit clickbait factory now, and it doesn’t deserve your IP address on its bullshit server to show off for the ad…

No, ESPN, your time was way back when you ‘parted ways’ with Jemele Hill for telling it like it is. 

I got one word for you: OFFENHAUSER!!!

Or, alternatively...

I think I’d rather have this than a 718 GTS 4.0, or even a 911 GTS 4.0-Hell, I might pick it over a C8. It’s a pure sports car in a way most major manufacturers can’t or won’t deliver, with beancounters and product testers soaking every quirk and character out in the name of saving money and appealing to the masses...…

See, that’s the difference between designers and engineers. Designers would have made this sound amazing, but with poor wind resistance... Unless you told them to make it REALLY LOUD!

How fast can a car compactor make it a nice yellow cube? 

Right! Like, how much did YOU donate, motherfuckers, and if it wasn't 100 MILLION DOLLARS then who cares about what percentage of your net worth it was? Some people just can't see a forest for the woods. 

There, now there's five of us, like the Power Rangers! 

I like,

A spare wheel on the front? I'm stealing that! 

The whole world is remote working, why not answer customer service calls and cold-sell insurance from the woods in a van? 

Fine, more for me.