He was unfamiliar with the layout of the house because the owner had put on an addition unlike any other.

Look on the bright side, Florida. Lots of Southerners look stupid at home with a Stetson.

Please consider live in Chiapas! ... compared to other states in Mexico, this is very quiet and safe, if you want a city of medium size you can consider Tuxtla Gutierrez, if you want some place more Colonial and smaller the place most be San Cristobal de las casas, if you want a warmer and humid place to think about…

I was just there, and walked (and Uber-ed) all over by myself all the time at all hours. If you’re not an idiot about where you go, it feels safer than half the U.S. and most of urban Europe. I certainly took a turn down a street or two that I didn’t like the look of, and turned around, and I’m sure crimes do happen,…

He supports free-market solutions for people with autism. Like...uhhhh...private companies taking the place of medicaid and disability assistance, I guess. Or churches doing it or whatever or...look, just shut up and read Atlas Shrugged, ok? It explains it all in there.

Rumor has it the cheerleaders were also part of a pyramid scheme.

I can’t take credit for this, Matt Ufford on twitter can. I’m stupid and can’t link tweets.

That depends. If the goal of the race is to run the best possible time, yes, it’s a basic fuckup. If the goal of the race is to win (like the goal is in every other sport in the world) then this is the only way, by taking risks like this. The Falcons didn’t say “oh no, we’re scoring too many points, we better slow…

Reading this, I’m so glad my dad doesn’t give a shit about anything I do.

IT’S LIKE A CONTRARIAN HIPSTER SPORTS TAKE MEETS DR. SEUSS BOOK

“These people have awful names.”

- @gehrig38

I want one of them to explain how GPS and satellite television work with a flat Earth.

yeah, because they don’t cover “the earth is round” until your 4th year at Duke.

Ugh. A racist AND a homophone!

MILWAUKEE-Asked restaurant host: “God, did you hear about Peter King?”
Host: “No.”
Me: “Died. from righteous indignation.”
Thought he would cry

Jorts Jerkins

My first reaction was, “what an asshole”. Then I remembered he’s just a kid and kids are dumb and probably thought this was funny and that I’m old and what seems funny to me seems strange to the young generation. I am 12 years his senior and the only time I’ve been on TV it was because I caught a foul ball while I…