Way to fuck up the Browns draft position, Mayfield.

Kant* would say that for the triathlete to eat 100 plates of sushi to be permissible, it must be possible for all people dining at that restaurant to also eat 100 plates of sushi. Since that would cause harm by putting the restaurant out of business, this is clearly unethical.

And this thoughtless, vile cruelty is a big part of his brand and why a large portion of this nation likes him.

that’s the joke

I wish I were a chef in the White House, just so every June, I could serve Donald Trump a birthday cake that says: 72 Years Ago You Should Have Been a Blowjob, Happy Birthday!

No, I think Hinkie is the type of person who sees a list of the 100 greatest novels ever written and reads all of them over a year just to check a box.

I love when people are SUPER into “life hacks” talk this way about books. Unless you’re talking about self-help books, which can almost always be condensed into fewer than 10 pages without losing anything, a summary or list of takeaways from a book misses the point of reading in the first place. Sure, you could read…

Who said that? I heard something, but I don’t see--oh, you’re down there!

im always winning u hater and loser lol

It’s barely even parody at this point.

That’s kind of a blanket statement, isn’t it?

I have reservations about starring this comment.

they can’t make the Indians give him back, that would be offensive

Because of all the economic anxiety?

Branching family trees?

There’s one way to identify yourself as an outsider to residents of Appalachia

I’m calling it now: The Browns are going 0-0-16 this season. 

UPDATE: Tony Romo was injured on the play.

....you forgot to include your favorites “below”.

....you forgot to include your favorites “below”.

I get the fact that it is functional, but how about not making it look like the nanny’s diaper bag?

I get the fact that it is functional, but how about not making it look like the nanny’s diaper bag?