I am sad that this nanny is named Christine. I was hoping for Jennifer. I want him to only date people named Jennifer.

I’m impressed if she can haul the trailer with this car.

This clearly flies in the face of everything that Maxxism stands for. Hell you might as well just go to Lenins & things.

it seems like she’s saying she wanted to give a medal to herself. she isn’t asking for you, or for society to give her a medal. she has that right to do that for herself. it seems like most of you would be more understanding if it were a pair of shoes, or makeup, or something. can’t we just pretend that’s what it was,…

Is it wierd that I totally forgot that Teen Mom Farrah Abraham was actually a mom?

I think that Tori has always cultivated her look very carefully, if you read her interviews, etc. She purposely went for a more chill look with Little Earthquakes following Y Kant Tori Read (which I secretly love and much prefer the 80s version of Cool On Your Island).

In fairness, when you are in your 20s that beauty regime works really well. Over 40 there is a risk you will just look homeless.

I am just so very glad that Tori’s face seems to have gotten past the alien Shirley McClain period it went through.

Argh, I hate the way people treat fish as disposable. Bettas need at least 2-3 gallons and a filter, if you don’t have live plants. Goldfish can live for 5+ years if you take care of them right (they produce a lot of ammonia and need a good filter and plenty of space).

And to top everything off, Precious Joyce, why do you think a restaurant wants a five hundred dollar bill? How the fuck are they going to break it? That would wreck their change making ability for the night.

My cat, who once opened a microwave oven while the popcorn was popping, has more self-control than the caramel lady.

My cat, who once destroyed a floor-to-ceiling lamp with her butt, has more self-control than the caramel lady.

My cat, who once fell off a bookshelf at 3 AM only to land butt-first on my face (catass…

Get A Cat

I love your handle.

I’m saying this as a gay man: I FUCKING HATE ROBERT AND SOL. Fucking pricks. Don’t act like you weren’t cheating on your spouses. I’m all for finding new love and all that, but they really screwed over the ladies, and that was hella shitty.

I stare at my ceiling like this all the time and I’m like, “Is that a bug? Please god, don’t let it be a bug. Maybe that spot has always been there and I never noticed it before. It’s not moving. Wait, I blinked. Did it move? I think it moved. Is it staring back at me wondering if I’m a person?”

he flight attendant told her that she could not give her one but then handed an unopened can of beer to a man seated nearby. Ahmad questioned the flight attendant.

While I think open conversations are an important part of parenting, I think it’s kind of disingenuous to claim a parent can just tell their child that the man walking a woman on a leash around the mall is just “make believe.” Kids generally know that normal adults don’t usually play make believe in public and walk…

Wait so you want us to be against the STORE CLERK in this situation? Who is probably making around minimum wage?? Yeah, it probably wasn’t the nicest thing to say out loud, but jeez, s/he probably meant it literally. It literally must be nice to have that life. It literally must be nice to be able to make that choice…

I agree that it may be unlikely that someone will come along and harm your child but there it’s still a risk. It is also unlikely (unless you live in say... Detroit) that someone will steal your car if you run into the grocery store and you leave your Car running, unlocked with the keys in it, but I think most people…