Do you even need food when you’re smoking meth? 

At my HS graduation anyone who still owed parking fines or other fees got a bill in a folder at graduation instead of their diploma. 

Pictured: the medical expert who invented this revolutionary treatment.

Also resembles old Citroens with single spoke wheels. 

Changing the law so only neighborhood residents can report code violations would effectively solve this problem. Or get rid of the codes entirely and let people do what they want with their own damn land. 

Farthest east I’ve been in Europe was Prague and I successfully drank tap water without dying. Germany’s tap water is perfectly fine and most of the restaurants I dined at refused to serve it. 

Fuck LaCroix. I hope they go out of business so my damn condo isn’t littered with almost full cans that my girlfriend claims “went flat” and can’t be bothered to throw in the trash.

I had an Uber driver a few months ago who was leasing through a program like this. He told me he wasted most of his morning waiting in line four hours to get an oil change completed at one of the few facilities approved by his lease program. he was planning to work well into the night to make to make up the time.…

In parts of Europe it’s common for restaurants and bars to refuse to serve tap water and only offer bottled water for sale. This has always struck me as wasteful since their tap water is perfectly good. 

Exaggerating on college applications is pretty normal. I put that I won second place in my HS’s student film competition. This was technically true, I just chose not to disclose there were only 2 entries. 

He’s been in congress with a six figure income since the early 90s, it would be more of a story if he was poor. What would a democratic socialist be blowing all that money on? 

During my broke college days I once made chicken and rice and topped it with ranch during a “Oh god what is left in this kitchen I have literally zero dollars until payday” moment. The ranch drenched rice wasn’t bad, kind of a poor man’s risotto. Pot helped.

Ah yes, Goodburger, the movie where 2 of the best cars I’ve owned were smashed into each other. 

Least satisfying finale in history? Try telling that to anyone who loved The Sopranos, Dexter or Lost. 

Hopefully my 4Runner lands me in sexy Toyota territory.

Was the ending really that unsatisfying for Jon? He never wanted to be King in the North, he didn’t want the Iron Throne, and now he gets to leave all those pressures behind and presumably have adventures beyond the wall with Ghost and his buddy Tormund.

My girlfriend doesn’t drive and knows nothing about cars. When I picked her up in my Z I had to explain why I needed to keep moving the stick around while we were driving.

Porsche, McLaren, Ferrari, BMW and others would beg to differ. 

This is a very bad take, especially considering how Southwest attempts to play up the friendliness angle in their promotions. Every time I fly them the flight attendants are almost annoyingly cheery. On one flight the attendants played a song once we reached cruising altitude and gave everyone who stood up and danced…

No one in the Panhandle will object to this.