Pure sex

Because conservatives and their viewpoints are idiotic.

It is worth remembering, they used to advertise (in reviews) that you could fit a set of golf clubs in the trunk. It was an effective tidbit to push and clearly many owners (I bet the market research shows plenty of golfers like ‘Vettes) did just that.

I’m sure you’re a frickin’ ball.

See you in the cancer ward, slick

Get fucked.

This, is truth.

This is a douchey take...it wasn’t JUST the weight gain, all of his vital measurements, like cholestorol, blood pressure, etc. went haywire and moved into ‘unhealthy’ ranges.  And yes, gaining a bunch of weight fairly quickly IS BAD FOR YOU, body shamers be damned.

Sandwich requires two pieces of bread.  Hot dog only uses one.

You’re making me throw up

Two acceptable ingredients on top of hot dogs are kraut and mustard. Full stop.

Hee hee, you said “lineups”...I learned that one from Kids In The Hall

A Thurmond on the Mount(ain)?

Plus, guns and casual racism!

What the hell is Blaze Pizza?

No, it isn’t

Fish is grody for all times and occasions.

Stick your hand in the garbage disposal.

OOH I LIKE TOMATOES!

That an Italian-American gang of high school hoodlums called The Golden Guineas, who hailed from a nearby ‘city’ (all of our area are towns or villages) would roll into our village on Halloween night to beat up people for no reason.