It consistently blows my mind that people who claim to be the most American Americans to ever ‘Murican idolize a man who literally fought a war against America, and lost.

Well we all know that “Exclusively for PS5" actually just means “Not XBox or Switch”.

Well fuck me running.

And how Tupac really died.

They’re both originally from Newgrounds.

That one’s actually had a permanent place on my hard drive since before Youtube was a thing.

Obligatory:

I mean, if a former Eagles quarterback is going to have the shit kicked out of him, I’d rather it be Michael Vick.

And here I thought the Tesla truck was hideous.

Nah, fuck those guys. I try to have empathy by default, but as soon as you prove to me that you have none yourself you can go fuck yourself.

Yeah, the state should absolutely be paying for this shit.

I’m not saying someone should shoot this prick in the head, but it sure would be nice if he would just, you know, die.

They’re quickly accelerating to fast.

Are you kidding? This is a joke article, right?

Well, readers, it’s because they are cartoons. They are cartoon boys. Humans are not meant to consume comparable amounts of dextrose. It’s just not worth it.

Well, that didn’t take long.

Such a great Ironside cameo, too.

Still, this was good stuff, and the simple fact that Morty cleaned up his own mess helped elevate it from yet another “Morty learns a valuable lesson about not to fuck with Rick.”

I never watched The Wire, but I loved him on Community.