Eh, it’s no Viper.

I’ll grant that it is objectively safer in an emergency in which you’re stopped on the side of the road, but in the 24 years that I’ve been driving, the number of times I’ve had to pour gas into my car on the side of the road is zero. The number of times I’ve had to fill up at a station is significantly higher than…

“Let’s do some retro stripes.”

Lift kits are fine, but they need to be limited. You want to lift your 4Runner a couple inches to make it more off-road capable? Great! You want to lift your F-150 a foot to fit tires so big that you have to extend your axles anyway and just drive around in traffic and take up 4 parking spots at a time? Fuck all the…

I just want either of the cars called ‘Vision’ to be real and drivable. Give me a 3- or 4-rotor RX-Vision or a Gas/Hybrid/EV Hyundai N Vision that can be fueled somewhere between the two coasts.

If I wanted to drive with my dome light on, I’d have to open the door, which I believe most cops would take issue with.

Distracted driving, my ass. That’s attempted manslaughter.

Wouldn’t the sharks get electrocuted, too?

I feel completely vindicated in all the trash I talked about this when they first announced the casting.

That picture is the desktop image on 6 monitors in my home office.

Why. The. Fuck. Would. Anyone. Take. Their. Child. To. A. Place. Called. Dirt. Dog. Las. Vegas.

“I spent 31 years in the military as a doctor and never got to shoot anyone. It was my turn!”

When Gus Van Sant is director, you need at least a second.

Just give me a damn classic start menu/taskbar without having to use a third-party mod.

Well, at least they don’t have to worry about doing a sequel.

How could this possibly go wrong?

Nothing about Ice Planet?