Good Lord. Gentlemen, get one of these and use it.

I was literally thinking the same exact thing and almost wrote that.

The second I read those three sentences, I thought “Okay, that’s why everyone loves Monty Williams so much.” The kind of person who can say something like that, in that situation, is the kind of person who is going to be loved by a lot of people.

at the risk of sounding horrible, that right there might be the only reason religion is worth anything: perspective

Starting now I am banning anybody that mentions traveling.

“glue guy”
“gym rat”
“hustle”

When you've had the kind of drought the Skins have had, there comes a time that even your Cousins start to look pretty good.

That ‘technology’ is JavaScript, and you do it via displacement mapping. You can do it by opening the image in Photoshop, and using a modal dialog to affect the changes, or incorporate the JS into the file’s associated XML. Either way, TNT didn’t pay the right ‘IT guy’.

Remember when Drogba went to Shanghai to collect his fat paycheck? It lasted 6 months. Once these players get there they realize their mistake and come back.

Oh my stars! The gall of that gentleman to cause offense by inserting his forearm into the circle thing! He’s fortunate I was not present, lest he have a thumb bit angrily in his direction!

The federal budget deficit has declined every year from 2009 to 2015 already.

Right, the athletic department funds itself, but without any classes for the players to attend, none of them will be eligible to play.

+ $53,170

And that he was sharp enough to block out the routing number for the picture. I think we’ve finally found our real-life Adequate Man.

It’s fantastic that both teams decrease wins with this trade.

Certain Fallon d’Floor finalist.

It’ll be weird to see somebody turnover something to Dalton for a change.

He’ll be OK. Dalton’s baggage always seems to find him in the first round of the playoffs.

“Isn’t that John Candy? Nope. Just my lazy eye playing tricks on me again.”

We need to set up a meeting with Joe and Ricky Williams.