I didn't even escape the horrible first time curse. Of course, I'm a dude. If there's anything I'd ever bet my life savings on it's that the first time with a dude is going to be empirically terrible.

Man, this is bullshit. I never ONCE had sex in high school.

We should be so lucky.

I mean, I don't know why sluts have to pick between seducing men and voting. Nine times out of ten seduction really only takes about 15 minutes start to finish anyway.

You know, I probably do need just a bit of break from the norm. You know, just a bit of something to break all the monotony.

Does this mean I have to stop "keepin' it real"?

This would be relevant only if the author reads Crasstalk. And why would the author read Crasstalk?

THANK YOU.

Admittedly, I do not know what a poppy bloom looks like. It's just the picture I picked when I googled it.

Haha. Oops. Picked the wrong plant. [tinyurl.com]

It smells like flowers if flowers were heroin...

Well, now I know what to get my wife for our upcoming anniversary.

You know, there are all kinds of milestones I'm looking forward to with my daughters: teaching them to read, taking them to their first real amusement park when they can ride most of the rides, taking them camping, teaching them how to ride a bike. I'd love to go on a cross-country road trip with them and show them…

Except for that kid. Poor kid.

Intelligent Design is simply a semantic revision of the idea of creationism. It is subjective; it is supernatural. It cannot be tested empirically, therefore it has no place being taught, or even discussed, as a scientific viability.

I am anti-graphic tee because I'm old(ish), but I will definitely be buying some of those for my kids. I'll let them take the heat.

Considering Tennessee just passed a bill effectively allowing creationism to be taught in schools as a potential credible alternative to evolution, it should come as no surprise that lawmakers both do not understand the biology of procreation and believe that this bill was the logical revision to make in light of…

Apart from the strange choice that Octomom made buying spray paint instead of crayons, that's a lot like what I would imagine the house of a single mother of 14 small children would look like.

In my day, if we wanted to get super fucked up on the cheap, we'd just buy some crack.

Kim, who recently started dating rapper Kanye West, said she thinks she owes her success to the internet and thinks she wouldn’t be famous without the world wide web.