The postal worker in my neighborhood is great, but at my last place OH MY GOD every fucking time!

Unfortunately, yes, which explains why when I switched to Prime they started using that roughly 50% of the time. I'm pretty sure they've got a big warehouse in Long Beach, CA and I'm not far from there.

I just tried it out for the first time a month or two ago, so "keep" giving them money isn't right. They won't even give me a partial refund if I cancel, so I'm stuck with it until I can opt out.

Maybe soon Amazon can figure out a button that understand that UPS and FedEx can't get into my fucking building and stop sending shit that way. I think another two dozen phone calls will fix it!

It's a duck blur!

He has Little Nicky-syndrome.

Shinning? Don't you mean Shining?

It's about this time I should admit I'm drunk.

I said email me, come on, let's keep this professional!

I just call it lottery tickets for the 1%.

HEY! That's a… that's a lot of big words there.

I got this macro lens that will make the area between your asshole and your ballsack look like Kubrick faking the moon landing.

I just always assume a base level of evil when it comes to California tech startups these days.

That's why you should always hire a professional photographer.

Keep it in your pants, Anthony Weiner, your dick has destroyed America already!

Sweet, so not only do I not understand the appeal of this app, it's also morally repugnant as well.

Who wants to put money on how long before one of these gets stuck in somebody's rectal cavity?

I prefer Wingdicks.

#WiggumNever

I don't know if it's similar on Uber, but I had to go to fly out of town a few weeks ago and my Lyft rides to and from LAX totaled, like, $12. Now I live fairly close (off the 105, WHAT WHAT!), but I'm still shocked that a dropoff/pickup to/from that clusterfuck isn't automatically, like, $30 at a minimum.