The attempted rape likely caused the victim to be in an emotional state that led her to jump in front of the rapist’s car. Typical lack of response by the police.

“I’m glad this didn’t blow up in his face.” — JPP

This is my favorite part

In all fairness, this is the plane

I think this needs more five pointed stars.

The fact that Dr. Z had a stroke that left him unable to communicate while Peter King got his own vanity microsite remains all the proof I need that there is no just and loving God.

Nobody’s perfect.

Why didn’t he apologize to the one-loss Panthers?

Yeah, you can’t call people “fa**ot.” The asterisks are too hard to pronounce.

So Beckham balked at Ball, who was brandishing a baseball bat for Bene Benwikere? And Brad beckoned Beckham to back up from Ball’s bat?

Except that was the funniest thing ever.

I hate Steve Harvey. He’s never said anything funny. And he’s a dick. I can’t believe he has a show telling women what to do, and women watch it. WTF? This guy is vile. And apparently stupid.

It’s a damn shame the Panthers don’t have Norman and Steve Smith on the same team this year. That would be the greatest one-two smack talk punch in the history of the game.

Now they know how the Carolina Panthers feel.

Still a better defender than James Harden.

I brought it out so the rest of you could enjoy it. That kind of crazy needs a platform.

Gregg Popovich is the cranky old uncle who on your 18th birthday gives you the best advice you will ever hear in your lifetime, something that you will carry in your heart for the rest of your days.

Bill Belichick is the cranky old uncle who loses you in a card game with heroin dealers.

This is the most delusional comment I have ever read on Deadspin.

hey. HEY. stanford and USC are both rich kid’s clubs.

Produced By: Kenny Powers
Edited By: Stevie Janowski