As long as they get the writers from 27 Dresses, we should be fine.

I legit have to talk myself into watching the Rockets. “Okay, Harden is the MVP. The Rockets are good. You’re going to enjoy this gam—[Harden twitches and draws a foul]—oh, for fuck’s sake.”

The Rockets are the answer to the question “what would it take to get me rooting for the ruthless inevitability of another Warriors championship again?”

pulls a Crosby.....

Dear [Volley Ball Coach],

Um, I think we’re all missing the point. Clearly Rosen’s girlfriend had her wits about her in the airport and, knowing it was the Browns, made something up that would “turn them off”. Brilliant strategy on her part.

Here’s what bothered me so much on the collab: So Gaga has a song that’s supposed to be in support of women who have been raped that are due justice and help. But on the same fucking album, you have R.Kelly?!?!!? Like what type of hoops did you triple back flip through to have your conscience clear on that decision?

Thank you! I love Gaga and when that came out, I was baffled that she’d ever collaborate with a known POS. And yeah, the lyrics of that song are so disturbing now that we have even more details on his sex cult. But you’re right, it was known for years that he illegally married Aaliyah when she was 14. *shudder*

I do wonder how you can so much as sit in a room, much less work together, with the guy and not look directly at him and say, “Hey, you’re that guy who essentially brags about fucking children.”

“often in their late teens”

The baby with the one eyebrow grows up to be Marshal Matt Dillion.

My friend from the future says The Simpsons’ record will be broken in 2038 with the airing of the eleven thousand and thirty-fifth episode of Kevin Can Wait.

No, don’t back down now you chickenshit. You took his ridiculous side as if there’s a fucking DA that exists that would try somebody in 2018 with the defense in possession of exonerating tape.

You think the fucking defense counsel has the video and hasn’t made it public? Fuck outta here.

And the headline should probably read “...in Nature and Nightlife”. Not that they didn’t give us pedants plenty to work with before, but it’s definitely more since the Change/Kinjapocalypse/Gizmodofication.

Accidentally admitting you’re a serial killer totally sounds like the kind of thing I would do on a Thursday. I could never get the hang of Thursdays.

HeWhoCannotBeNamed from The Dwarves faked his own death. The band claimed he had been stabbed to death in a bar fight in Philadelphia following a show. Unfortunately, the band didn’t let Sub Pop Records know it wad fake. Sub Pop issued an official release regarding his death.

Wakanda Forever.

Right - so the first couple times you hear it, you’re like, aw man there go coach being coach. smh.

Any half-wit can do the x’s and o’s stuff

“And Mack is only one of the wealthy and influential women caught in Raniere’s orbit. As far back as 2010, Vanity Fair ran a story called “The Heiresses And The Cult” detailing how Seagrams heiresses Sara and Clare Bronfman had blown more than $150 million of the family fortune on Nxivm and Raniere”