No, those are in the gift bags for the Golden Raspberry Awards, sorry.

Well...

“The killer will never think to look for us in my collection of Eyes Wide Shut orgy robes.”

If you haven’t clicked the Delish link for a fuller accounting of the swag bags, do so; it’s wonderfully preposterous. We have the Shinery Radiance Wash all-in-one hand soap + jewelry cleaner (it’s always nice when a product can perform multiple functions), Jambys “performance inactivewear” (because how else are you…

The 80s and 90s are littered with the corpses of film studios who somehow found a way to not quite pull this trick off (of not losing money or even going broke).

To be fair, the killer is just an amateur who learned everything they know from watching slasher movies. Or at least that’s my recollection of the premise of the only one I saw.

Oh, that’s what I’ve been doing wrong. *scribbles notes*

GOT A BABY ELEPHANT VACUUM CLEANER! 

You forgot American π

Meanwhile at...oh, also the BBC...unnamed senior sources say an environmentalism-related episode of David Attenborough’s Wild Isles has been cut from airing, for fear of offending the conservatives.

Pluto has long held the “how is this streaming service legal and what kind of data are they stealing from me” title, successfully fending off fellow impossible-to-believe streamer Tubi

Basement, Pistols, License to Kill

Black Christmas is so great it somehow got remade 2 times and they both sucked. Which makes the original seem even better to me ever time I rewatch it!

Not going to argue with the selection, going to argue with the “hear me out” tone.

Will ends up taking Odd Job and Rock blames Jada for telling him to do it

Was this written by all of the staff? 

Jack Black’s Sac Axed Lest Rest See Yellow Testes

No one on the right actually believes in free speech. They only believe in freedom from consequences for themselves and those with likeminded opinions. The idea that they have any kind of moral or logical high ground on this issue is laughable. As is the idea that anyone—be it a university, a traditional media outlet,…

Yes. One might say .... Lilith fair.