Schills would never understand that joke.

You know what they've been saying, though. Never bet against FilthyWhore. 

I’ve taken to my buddy referring to it as “isn’t water pretty?” the film

“I’m just like you regular folks; I put my diamond-encrusted pants on one leg at a time like everyone else. Well, my man Javier puts them on for me, but you get the idea.”

I truly do hope the movie is good for all of those that are excited for it, but I would very much like if the man who is closer to a billionaire than he is farther away from it would get sprayed with a water bottle like a ornery cat the next time he tries to describe any aspect of himself as “blue collar”. 

In the UK we’ve a channel that was rebranded as “Dave”, which is just as idiotic. It’s actually shown some decent comedy (with Taskmaster debuting on it), but I still wince whenever I hear the name.

Even stupider than Joey Jo Jo Junior Shabadoo?

I wanted to make a joke here using an awful Republican Florida politician, but I kinda just gave up from choice paralysis.

But the one in the Florida park will be revamped to be more racist, right?

Maybe it’s supposed to be it’s own marketing tie-in.

Oh yeah?  Well if you used a little more Dial soap you would maybe stop being a FilthyWhore and be a CleanWhore.

Indiana Jones and the Dial Up of Destiny.  You will believe a man can eventually go online!

Honestly, I’ll take it. Mainstream cinema has become so rigid and sanitized that I’ll take a blast of lol-so-crazy late-00s bullshit.

Wahhhh! Chris Pratt doesn’t sound like MY Mario!!! This is gonna flop because me and all my thirty year old childless friends are NOT going to see this!!!

Because it’s all actually incredibly tame and calling it “psychological torture” is dumb clickbait.  

Yeah, it’s hard to characterize “convincing a grown adult that witches are real” as “psychologically torturing” them. 

Okay, that’s just plain hilarious. Totally sounds like something me and my friends would do to each other back in the day.  What a great way to break up the monotony of the long hours on a shoot.

It actually has a lot of world-building but could also be interpreted as the story of an over-imaginative kid dealing with sibling rivalry when the new baby comes home. The Netflix show and sequel get rid of that ambiguity, of course, but the original movie is mildly thoughtful. Good god, I can’t believe I’ve become…

Wait until you see who stars in Lady Chatterley Goes to Dinosaur Land!