You try and write a short article by yourself!

Like martial arts, they’re teaching audiences how to build bombs so they never have to use them!

I’d watch Jesus Revolution just to see if “Jesus Is Just Alright” is used somewhere. I know it’s pretty much a given and I know I could save myself time and money by just checking online, but still, I’ve got nothing else going on.

“Ian Fleming Publications have also taken the liberty of removing some of the stupider passages of his books, such as in Live and Let Die where Bond inflates villain Dr. Kananga like a balloon, which sends him flying around the room making a deflating fart noise until he explodes. Furthermore, the pigeons in Fleming’s …

Similarly, Garfield creator Jim Davis went on a disturbing, hate-filled rant about Mondays in a recent strip, which he then followed-up with an effusive essay about his favorite food lasagna.

Not that I disagree with it, but that complaint is kind of funny to read. Having to explain the popularity of South Park, the liberal use of italics for emphasis, quoting Matt Stone as saying “we have fuck you money now”.

“We’ve run many scenarios. So it is our hope that we will be prepared for anything that we may not anticipate right now but that we’re planning for just in case it does happen.”

Okay, but if we bring Kubrick back to life as a zombie and he ends up killing people and eating their brains instead of directing movies, that’s on you.

John Lennon must be rolling a stoney in his grave.

I saw that commercial endlessly as a kid and my main takeaway was that anime was just a sizzle reel of heads blowing up.

ENDUT! HOCH HECH!

Damn Cat People 2 has more legs than a millipede.

I really hope they play the Amok Time fight theme at his funeral.

Does this place give you the opportunity to live out Super Mario World by punching Yoshi in the back of the head?

Got a chill up my spine when Keaton appeared to his Batman theme.

I’m sure Cameron-stans are already aware of this but the re-release of Piranha II: The Spawning managed a respectable 759th place at the box office this week.

David Twohy should change his first name to Banjo.

If I were her, I’d at least ask for a gift card to Olive Garden or something.

“I WIELD THE WAND OF ODIN!”

Where the fuck is my Zelda II: The Adventure of Link remake??