It will be interesting to see how the 21st c. actors match up with their 60s counterparts: Julie Christie, Alan Bates, Peter Finch, and a young General Zod (Terence Stamp)

I’m still pissed that the upcoming playoffs will cut into the 30 million daily words and 9 million daily videoed minutes devoted to this most important of awards.

“Look, he’s leading us to victory even with my scores of empty. rhythm-shattering possessions”

Scoff if you want but for this brief shining moment he’s polling at the top of the 2016 GOP primary contenders/

Unfortunately the trend will be broken when Jon Lester throws to first base in his next start and the ball goes out of the stadium and rolls into a gutter, everyone fishes around for it but they have to go buy a new ball, resulting in a 22-hour game.

It's in a weird evidentiary zone like lie detector tests right now, absolutely inadmissible in a forensic/trial setting because it fails the Daubert test for scientific validity, but somehow revitalized in the "anything goes" world of sex crimes probation and approved by even the liberal 9th Circuit Court in an…

Listen to Jaws, he’s watched 14.6 billion years worth of game tape on the universe and has become a computational mentat able to discern and predict the movement of even subatomic particles.

Get it through your head, Barry, this is a question of.. (Barry turns enormous head) My mistake, nothing’s getting through that.

“What’s up, Human Pincushion?”

One more infraction and he’ll be relegated to Fox Sports 2, which is similarly unwatched and ignored but involves coverage of regional steeplechase racing and caber tossing.

I think it was always extemporaneous speaking that produced the non sequiturs and spittle. This recent visit in support of Charlie Strong is actually not a totally non-inspirational pep talk, so he’ll always have a home on the Zig Ziglar circuit.

Usually the 9th step involves making amends to the D-leaguer whose roster spot you’re currently occupying.

At least give him candor points for admitting he’s not trying.

Hopefully they don’t have an interleague game at Wrigley this year, because if he sees hundreds of cups full of pee, he may go catatonic.

Well at least now that the oil industry has learned that domestic abuse is a source of fuel they’ll do their best to eradicate it.

Dear Deadspin Staff: Please continue to frequently regale us with tales of woe from Chicago, the last surviving outpost of civilization in the Western Hemisphere. We here in the irradiated wastelands don’t have much to live for, apart from the occasional prairie dog hunt or picture of a cup with some pee in it.

I’ve got it: Chinese finger trap technology, but on a neck collar that slowly, progressively tightens over the course of a game the more a pitcher shakes off signs.

My mistake, everyone, after a through and thrashing fact-checking I have been made aware that Raymond Felton is not currently on the Mavericks because of a trade, he just showed up at a team luncheon in the offseason and charmed the brass when he attempted to make off with a steam tray full of fajita meat. I will…

Unwatchable? He’s got one hell of a glass house called Traded For Raymond Felton Manor.

The Masters: a tradition* unlike any other**.