Seriously, how do you not hand off stories like this to Fancy Kristen?

Alternate headlines:

Yes! Coming from a 300ZX, it needs to look like a sports car too, other than the Alfa none of the cars in the article do. This or the BRZ are the correct answer.  

That’s a great idea. If Granny is kind of out of the loop regarding cars, it would be a good joke to bring her one of these and tell her, “Here’s the modern version of your beloved 300ZX! It’s basically the same car as your old model, but a little more up-to-date - see, it’s got keyless access and Bluetooth! - and I…

Ah yes, the younger crowd, the ones who could just about afford a used C5. Yes, this will surely be a smashing sales success!

If she can live with the second set of doors the Kia Stinger may be a good choice:

Torch’s nuts.

my god, this is absolutely the right take. It’s a bit bigger, a lot meaner, and she can afford it. You wanna be the cool old lady with the baddass coupe that is also actually somewhat more practical than your old 300zx? GT-R.

Nice. That would be quite a retort to all of the commenters suggesting mobility scooters.

Only one clear answer here:

Man, people are just phoning it in today.

I have said it before and I’ll say it again. Anyone who posts an automatic car as a manual in an online ad should be sentenced to death.

There is no greater disappointment than finding the perfect vehicle. Everything is exactly how you want it to be and then the interior shot comes and its a fucking automatic. The…

I have lurked on Jalopnik for years. This is the first comment that has lured me in to account ownership. You are wrong.

And then what to do with the other 16 grand?

As an Orioles fan, I don’t see the problem here. I hope we manage to keep him around.

It’s nuts how many of those pictures I can tie to specific lines of dialogue.