“He said it was unlikely that anyone would ever find the male character, who he planned to keep alive indefinitely.”

SEO marketing: you will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy.

The fact is the substance was legal until 2016 so the fact she was taking it up until the 1st Jan 2016 is irrelevant. She failed a drug test in one of the first tournaments of the year which tells me she wasn’t trying to hide anything. Total fuck up on her and her team’s part for not paying closer attention to the…

How much research do website editors do when contacted by non-personal essay authors? (this is genuine curiosity, I am not defending XOJane)

GOOP has you covered for fall, LiLo. Only $900 per glove.

It’s funny you think I have a penis. Also weird.

“I’m sorry, ma’am, your husband died.”

#paparazzilivesmatter

If I was coming from/going to a workout I’d just run. No way those guys can run with all of that camera gear, and I want to keep my mile time under 6 minutes anyway: win-win.

Because that would have been a million times better.

Same. Mostly b/c I have no filter and can’t control what comes out of my mouth.

Why did I read tires as tits?

Walk around eating handfuls of loose hamburger meat out of a bag labeled HUMAN FLESH.

I predict Angelina hooks up with Huma.

I’m with ya. And one part of me is like, “awww maybe they’ll reconcile!” And then the other part—the wiser, more sophisticated and wordly part—is like, “dude, he fucked the nanny. Heave ho!”

Ms. Lohan wants to clarify that her finger was lost in a freak accident, and definately not because she didn’t pay her debts on time and thereby offended a high ranking member of the Japanese Yakuza, who decided to take a finger as payment.

Part of Lindsay’s money was ripped off as well.

I think it was just a joke.

If you never have anything good to say about anybody, then come talk to me because you and I are going to have a fun time together.