Joseph McCarthy confuses Harry and Lloyd with communists and drags them before a Senate Sub-Committee.

It's such a pity your poems are so shitty.

Doink!

I am the one that walks…

The title needs more hyphens.  I hear Jay    Z has some to spare.

Whoever wins this battle will be king Faraday.

“You wanna know how powerful I am?…. I'm insulated with dielectric fluids containing polychlorinated biphenyls,” says Electro, "and PCBs are carcinogens."

If both your legs were broken, you might have a different stance. 

At least the advertisement (in the right margin) for the Norelco vibrator is appropriate here.

Dammit!  NOW what am I going to do with this $120?

I don't even OWN a Showtime!

This comment is driving my sarcasm meter crazy!  

I'm sure Miss Kitty will have something to say about this.

Gimmick?  Who'sth a gimmick?  Thufferin' Thuccotashth!

I'm choking one RIGHT NOW!

Stereotypes save time.

Congratulations @avclub-2af0c0dcfaa9891e9d29ea3cc27b2988:disqus, you're a four-time loser.

And by "raging, infernally-frustrated motorists" I assume you mean typical DC drivers.

Well, all day long at AV Club I hear how great Mercia is at this or how wonderful Mercia did that! Mercia, Mercia, Mercia!

Bitch be protestin' too much, yo.