Oh sure, but when I force crying little boys to hug me, it's a completely different story.

Coach Stoops: Daniel-son!

Those countries are closer to our peers than they are alternatives.

You're welcome for my continued support of Deadspin. Get me the hell outta the pending comments please.

Police departments need reform more than pretty much anything else in this country. Take the assault rifles out of their hands, pay them more, and require a college degree for the job, and you'll be able to cut the number of officers needed, have a more effective police force, and have a more trusted police force.

Belichick has a Vine account? Sweet.

The best way to reform the system would be to get rid of athletic scholarships. Period. Then kids who want to be professional athletes and aren't interested in school can go to a professional league. Maybe the NFL could even have a reserve league or something for the college age kids the way soccer leagues do.

I'd like to see the NCAA get eviscerated as the next guy, but: a) is the NCAA at the "too big to fail" stage where Congress will save it's ass? b) Would we be suffering from a "it's better than what would replace it?" kind of situation in college sports (i.e.: NFL/NBA just makes no bones about the fact that these…

After watching Scott vomit on the field during without any qualms, Bengals management has asked him to lead conditioning drills for the cheerleading squad.

Wow. Just looked at it. SMH

I did NOT see that coming

Go fuck yourself.

joe boobsman

Any protection against dropping draft stock due to say, felony allegations?

Boy the NFL spin machine is in high gear. Rice comes out of this video looking like a superhero.

A Sea-Doo is totally appropriate, when it's incorporated into a tasteful gift basket.

A Sean Newell Article Experienced by a Deadspin Fan:

You're from the south.

Matt Novak is a writer for a poor news source and you should be ashamed for liking him. His over analysis and misunderstanding of satire is lethargic and excessive to the point of adding nothing to the debate.

Next week: How Pootie Tang destroyed the English language...