It's horrible, but that footnote made me lol.

Thanks MeMa, hope you have fun at bingo tonight.

No. According to these sad people Lollapalooza was just shy of the Butan death march for sheer horribleness. All three of them were alone, sober, and looking down their noses at everyone else having a good time.

Put on your lifts, Mr. Cruise.

But her shoes were uncomfortable!

Thank you. Oh golly gosh, there are wasted youths in my presence, what ever am I going to do?

These people were never young enough for this shit. That one lady's memory of her very first concert is that her shoes were uncomfortable.

So, to sum up, AV Club writers are misanthropic nerds who rarely go out in public and hate being around people having a good time?

He's a smart dude, and at the very least he's fucking TRYING. Rex Reed would be happier if Franco was out blowing lines with Lindsay all weekend? No. Fuck Rex Reed, holler.

The movies look like David LaChappelle pictures come to life. Honestly, if you watch individual scenes with the sound off, they're amazing.

I'm less worried about the fanboys and more worried about Kasdan. It's been a long damn time since his glory days, and he's released some serious turds since then.

You're pretty filled with hate, huh?

Yes, what a hateful group to have presided over American culture's high-water mark. Too bad they can't be more like people today and exist in a solipsistic bubble of cell-phone staring with steadily decreasing shared-art experiences (great job killing the music industry!) and zero motivation to do anything beyond…

Dude, that was a quality retort. Nice job.

By yourself.

Not all of them had the nice house, but yeah: watching this now it's hard to give a shit about their problems when they have a 5000 sq foot house on 15 acres of land.

He helped draft the first of the new Star Wars movies.

Why not go for the baby oil? Do this: go to Target, buy a cheap plastic tarp, as big as you can get. Also get a giant bottle of baby oil and some swim caps (cause you don't want that shit in your hair).

What say you about Poolside?

The premise is shaky enough, but if they'd shown more train cars (I mean, it only took them 30 minutes to get to the front), I could deal with that. My problem were the other unexplained but totally obvious problems:
(1) The train sent an army of psycho axe-murderers to quell the rebellion, yet somehow 25-30…