You know, back in my day we had professional psychos fucking top Yankees brass for hush money, not this amateur hour crap.

Van Halen DUAN!

"I lost my voice two weeks ago, which I secretly enjoy. To other people, you sound sick and hungover. But in your head, you sound HUSKY and SEMI-BATMANLIKE."

Yeah, this thing is beyond skeevy.

Listening to a bootleg from the Hemispheres tour as I type.

Agreed. Also, people can't expect to undo months or years of relative inactivity in just a few weeks.

I just go by how well my clothes fit. When I can stop making new notches at the end of my belt, I'm doing better.

I've got a bloody poop story, do I send that to Drew or the tips address?

"I'm drawn to the pathetic, strangled yelp."

I figure that my son's survival instinct will kick in at some point and he'll just decide to eat. It's worked so far.

"My sources are untouchable, bitch."

I must have missed the announcement that every non-hetero group gets to lump themselves in with gays and lesbians. It used to be just Gay and Lesbian. Now it's Gay, Lesbian, Trans-Whatever, Curious, Bi, Robosexual, etc.

AJ almost went along with it until Conlin offered a "you scratch my back, I'll fondle yours" deal.

I think it was classified as an "aura migraine." She's OK now.

Not to worry guys, ESPN already has Sutcliffe's replacement ready to go. Prepare for heavy burtation.

"Have I stolen all that I can?" - Rudy Ruettiger

+1

"Whatever happened to camaraderie? That's my favorite Culture Club song." - Emmitt Smith

Re: Coaching Pittsburgh in 2012?

If I ever get access to All-22 footage, divorce papers can't be far behind.